My farewell to this blog and to Ra (part one)

I have decided to make series of blog posts to tie up loose ends and heal (this blog). I think people deserve closure and this is my way of obtaining mine.

Ra and I had a whirlwind adventure, one that is definitely for the books. Not too many people get that opportunity. We had big hopes and dreams of really helping those in the spiritual community. Idea after idea, we often fantasized about how we could turn our dreams into a reality and just live like spiritual nomads enjoying the peaceful path. Well, things shortly turned out to be not so peaceful after all and everything I had hoped became a distant memory…

This blog post will be biased and one sided because it is coming from my perspective of things. I will try my best to keep things as objective as possible. The last thing I want is for this post to be received as someone who is bitter and lashing out. I simply wish to share our story, from my perspective.

The initial journey…

As you all who may had been following this blog during that time, you may recall that Ra and I were planning on backpacking across the U.S. We had this big bright idea that we were going to detach from everything and live as nomads camping and traveling across the states till we got to our destination out west. After we got back to Atlanta things didn’t really go as planned and it was much to cold to try and make it on foot. So we settled in and continued to discuss our future. Shortly before thanksgiving of 2014 Ra and I had a huge blow up and I ended up going back home to Charlotte. His funds from his business had plummeted and suddenly he was accusing me of being the cause. He started to accuse me of being an agent and kicked me out of the hotel we were living in at the time. No car, no money I was put out and I had to figure out how I was going to get home. I ended up calling my dad and asking for some money which i really hated doing. I wasn’t that familiar with Atlanta or their public transportation so I had find my way to downtown Atlanta to catch the bus back to Charlotte. I was beyond scared. I didn’t want to get lost or miss the bus so I left hours early to ensure I would make it on time just in case I did get lost. Everything worked out and I was able to find my bus home.

Side Note:

To add to my frustration and Ra’s trust issues with me, after we did videos together on his channel, people said some of the most horrible things about me. I will say it takes a thick skin to be a public figure because from the comments on the videos and the emails people sent, it was just sad and disappointing. Disappointing because these are people who proclaim to be spiritual. Some of what was said people were telling him not to trust me and that I would bring his downfall etc. On top of the comments about how I looked and sounded. I genuinely wanted to help people but then when things like that happen it really discourages a person. At one point Ra had stopped doing videos and I convinced him that he needed to continue doing videos because people really look to him for guidance and that wouldn’t be fair. The same people who bashed me and accused me of the most insane things, I made sure he was there for them. That’s not to toot my own horn that is me expressing my frustration.

So anyway…

I didn’t hear back from Ra until after thanksgiving. He doesn’t use cell phones that much or if he does it’s always a prepaid phone and he changes them often. When he makes phone calls he always blocks his number. So he is a hard person to keep up with. Once he finally reached back out to me he apologized and asked that I come back. He said he had the financial situation fixed and that we wouldn’t have to worry about it anymore. Something about “them” writing contracts on me and money was being taken from his estate because he was living with me.

Side note:

Ra believes that names, identification cards, signing things, shopping at certain stores buying certain brands creates what he calls a “contract.” Once a contract is made money is then taken from his “estate” by way of withholding funds from his youtube royalties or money being taken from his paypal account. “Agents” follow him and write contracts on him. He would remove his cell phone battery from his phone. Remove the battery from his laptop. Remove the smoke detector from the wall because we could be watched through it. I was not allowed to turn on any electronics unless he was there or had given permission to do so. I had to explain this a little further to the best of my ability so that you can follow the story.

Now that the contract was broken I was free to come back. I thought that all the contract talk was a bit far fetched but he was so serious about what he was saying I knew he believed it. I thought maybe it was something I wasn’t seeing or hearing. He would tell me everyone else gets what hes saying so I thought maybe one day it would click. So I got back to Atlanta and I had gone to the store and gotten a bear naked bar, Ra was at work. We had been discussing trying again to go out west especially since I had a car. After I got finished eating my snack I went to throw away the wrapper and I had noticed the letters had rubbed off on my fingers from the expiration date. It spelled D I E. I was SHOCKED! Nothing like that had happened to me before and I know you reading this probably don’t believe it but I promise it was the most eerie thing ever. When Ra got back I showed it to him and he was in total shock also. He expressed to me that he had a rough day also and thought this was the sign we needed to leave Atlanta. So we decided to leave that next day. He told me had had enough money to get us there and everything and I had a few bucks so I thought it would be a fun trip. Finally, we get to pursue our dreams and really help people.

I was in for a rude awakening…


One thought on “My farewell to this blog and to Ra (part one)”

  1. Reblogged this on Practical Spirituality and commented:

    My “twin flame” and I started a blog that I managed during one part of our journey. After a serious of hurtful events I stopped blogging about it/us. Years later I am finally ready to come forward about my experiences in hopes to achieving peace. I invite you all to being part of my healing process.

    Thank you, Leann


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